Even though each person must grieve in their own unique way there are things about grieving that are common to all. For instance, I am sure that I am not the only person who had their spouse die who had to grieve alone with no family close by. But having said that, it does not negate my experience.
I have had conversations with men I know whose wives died like mine and one thing they had that I didn’t was the support of their immediate family members. People who would come over to clean and cook and help around the house. People who would come over to pull them ut of their funk. Family who was close by to pitch in and to help get through the hard times.
I had none of that. My children all live in another state. My mother lives far away. Kathy’s family disappeared from my life when she died. So I was left with only the help of very few friends to get through the hardest thing I ever experienced in my life. And even then few ever called unless I called them first. Looking back it’s a wonder that I survived at all.
I am grateful that I am not in that awful dark place I was in anymore. But I hope I learned a lesson from what happened to me.