I was thinking about the future today. My future to be exact. Looking at the list of things that need done, mainly to the house I live in. And as I pondered and planned it occurred to me; if I didn’t have to save up to do maintenance and repairs to my house I would have plenty of money to buy clothes or furniture or furnishings or to take trips. So doing what I have to do robs me of the means to do what I would love to do.
I have mentioned before how after Kathy died I looked to sell my home and move into a smaller apartment in the area. Until I looked at the prices. That’s why I shifted my focus from downsizing to keeping up the place where I currently live.
If I had unlimited resources I could do both what I’m required to do and what I would enjoy doing. But I don’t. And like economy dictates, it’s making the best use of limited resources.
My mortgage will be paid off in 2027. Then I will not have to worry about that. But can my house wait that long? Will I be as healthy then as I am now? Life is a gamble sometimes. I get impatient waiting. But waiting seems to be what I am good at now.
My Journey Through Grief And Beyond 